No Hoverboard? Blame Marty McFly

This is the year Marty McFly jumped to in Doc Brown’s time machine (in the movie “Back to the Future,” obviously.)

Today is the very day, Oct. 21, 2015. From today forward, all of “Back to the Future” takes place in the past.

And all around the universe we keep hearing the same refrain:

“Where is my hoverboard?”

It’s obvious. We don’t have them and it’s all Marty McFly’s fault.

It has to be. Look. In 1985 Marty jumped back to 1955 and changed things so that his parents would fall in love and have a great life. Then he jumped back to 1985, then forward to 2015 – a 2015 where they had hoverboards.

But Biff took the DeLorean back to 1955, gave himself the sports almanac and changed the future in an awful, awful way. Then Marty went back and changed what Biff had done, canceling out that timeline. Then of course he had to go back to the 19th century to save Doc again, before jumping back to 1985 to see that everything seemed to be back to normal.

Except something that Marty did in 1955 (or maybe back in the Wild West, who knows?) must have changed the timeline, because when he jumped to 2015, there were hoverboards. But when we got here the old fashioned way, no hoverboards. No self-tying shoes or self-drying clothes. And fax machines everywhere. Seriously, who uses fax machines in 2015?

It’s not that the movie makers got it wrong. If you want to blame someone because you don’t live in a world with Pit Bull hoverboards, look no farther than the only possible suspect.

Something Marty did altered the timeline and made it impossible for commercial hoverboards to be invented and produced for the public.

Damn you, McFly!

(Side note: I have always loved how in the second movie they actually had to pause while Doc drew out the timeline paradoxes, as if the production staff realized, “Man, I’m having trouble following this. The audience will never get it!)

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